Number of months since finishing chemo: 12
Number of months after finishing chemo that I got pregnant: 9
Level of surprise at getting pregnant so quickly: high!
Feeling at discovering I was pregnant: ecstatic!!
3 months ago I posted an entry about what the future might hold now that all my cancer treatment is finished, and in it I said that I hoped it might contain children. Then, just a few weeks after writing I found out I was pregnant - how amazing is that?!
I can't believe that I could be so lucky to have gone through everything I have over the last few years, and to come out the other side of it still able to have a baby. Looking at the positive result on the pregnancy test just felt like I was holding a miracle. The whole time I was going through all of the operations, tests and doses of chemotherapy I desperately tried to hold on to the dream that I might still come out the other side of it and have my own baby. But, when the cancer came back 6 months after finishing my first course of chemo I just felt like that possibility was slipping away. And now, I'm 3 months pregnant and around 20th June next year will actually be holding my own little bundle. It still just doesn't feel real!!
Of course, typically for me it hasn't all been plain sailing since finding out I was pregnant. An early scan when I was just 4 weeks pregnant revealed two cysts on my left ovary, and as the cancer in my right ovary presented initially as cysts both us and the hospital were pretty concerned about it. Fortunately further ultrasound scans have showed that they are just simple cysts, and one of them has now dissipated on its own and gone. The remaining one is causing a bit of a problem though - it's 4.5cm, which isn't massive, but it is big enough to feel uncomfortable. The real problem with it is that if it twists, which it's possible it could do, then I will lose the ovary. Seeing as that is the only one I've got left, that would be a very bad thing! It means that if the cyst doesn't go on it's own in the next few weeks then I'll probably have it drained to make sure that can't happen. Apparently there is a slight risk to the baby in getting it drained, because they could accidentally insert the needle into the womb rather than the cyst. However, if the cyst is left in place and it twists then not only would I lose my ovary, but it could put the baby at risk too. It's all so complicated, but then I'm never a straightforward case!
On top of the problems caused by the cyst, I also had a heavy bleed when I was 7 weeks pregnant and thought that I was going to lose the baby. It was really scary, but amazingly the baby hung on in there (it must have inherited its Mum's determined genes!) and since then there have been no signs of any bleeding, thank goodness.
So, it has been 12 months pretty much to the day since I had my last dose of chemotherapy, and the difference in my life one year on is huge. I have hair for starters, which I'm very grateful for in this cold weather! And now I'm pregnant too, and can look forward to 2009 being a life-changing year for all the right reasons, rather than all the wrong reasons of the last few years. It's amazing what a difference 12 months can make. I feel like this baby is the line that ends the part of my life where I was a cancer patient, and starts my life as me again. From June next year I will be a Mum! I can't think of a better way to wave goodbye to 2008 - the cancer is banished and in its place is a beautiful baby. I really am the luckiest person in the world.
Em
Tuesday, 30 December 2008
Pregnant After Cancer!
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11 comment(s):
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you and what a miracle! I bet this pregnancy helps tremendously toward you not having to think about the cancer and look forward to a new future as a mom. So many of us don't get that opportunity and you were blessed enough to. All the best for continued remission and happy New Year to you!)
Congrats again EM!!! What a wonderful mom you're going to be!
xoxo
Thank you both. I certainly do feel like the luckiest person in the whole wide world right now! :-)
Em xxx
hey i read the hair loss part. I was jus wondering how did you manage the eyelahes and eyebrow. Becoz my mother and I were thinking if we could get fake ones in case she has to go out. Is it possible..will appreciate if you would let me know.
Hi Utopia
Thanks for your messages. I'm sorry to hear your Mum is about to start going through treatment.
To be honest when I lost my eyelashes and eyebrows I didn't worry about it too much, but I know a lot of other people who drew in their eyebrows with an eyebrow pencil, and I think a couple tried false eyelases too.
It might be worth your Mum buying some false lashesd if she feels it will make her feel better and more confident about going out, but she may find she becomes so tired and caught up in the chemo that she will end up not caring. Either way, buying some while she's still feeling up to it is probably a good idea just so she has the option. You could also get someone at a store makeup counter to show her how to pencil in her eyebrows in case she wants to do that too.
Please pass on my good wishes to her, and I hope the treatment goes well.
Take care
Em xxx
Hi Em
Just came across your blog after reading your letter in Ovacome. Just wanted to let you know that aged 23 in 1993, I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer. Not a lot of us youngsters about you know! It was almost impossible to find anyone else under the age of 30 to talk to at that point - everyone else suffering seemed to be over 50! Anyway after, surgery, chemotherapy, more surgery, ivf, ivf again and here I am. Just celebrated my 40th birthday, 2 wonderful children now aged 11 and 7, and just a single routine checkup once a year!
All the very best for the future!
S x
Hi S
Thanks for leaving me a message, it's lovely to hear from you.
I wrote the Ovacome piece because I don't feel there is any proper support out there for women like us who get diagnosed so young. Like you said, it's all geared for older women who don't necessarily have the same worries as us, like infertility.
It's really fantastic to hear stories like yours and to know there are other women out there who have recovered so successfully.
I really wish you lots of continued health.
xxx
Thanks for sharing your story which has given me a bit of hope. I'm 31, have lost one ovary to cancer and been through chemo. The doctors are advising a radical hysterectomy as the best course of action over the next few years to make sure the cancer doesn't come back, but with no children of my own and at only 31, it's not an easy decision to make. I'm so worried about the cancer returning though that surgery sooner rather than later seems the best option.
Wishing you the very best of luck with your pregnancy and a great year!
C xx
I completely understand how tough that decision is. Your heart wants one thing but your head and probably most of the people around you tell you the other. The maternal urge is such an incredibly strong one that it is very hard to put away.
The only thing I can say is talk in depth to as many professionals as you can about what they would advise in terms of timescales - your oncologist, surgeon, a fertility doctor if possible and maybe your GP too if they are good and understanding. Maybe, if they haven't already, they can offer you some percentages in terms of the chances of the cancer coming back that will help to make your decision easier?
I really hope that everything goes well for you. Please keep in touch to chat if you want to - you can email me directly using the 'Contact Me' link here on the blog.
Em xxx
Hello,
I hust read your article in Ovacome and it touched a nerve. I was 17 when diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer and had a tumour removed and my left ovary. I honestly felt like there was no support at the time for young people with this type of cancer and recognised your concerns about children etc. So great to read your story - made me smile. 13 years on for me and I'm married and 6 month pregnant and 13 isn't such a lucky number after all. I just wanted to wish you and yours all the best.
Natalie
Hi Natalie
That's FANTASTIC news! I'm so glad that everything is going well for you after being diagnosed so young. It's really great to hear your story, and I'm glad you enjoyed my Ovacome piece.
I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well and you carry on being healthy and happy! :-)
Em xxx
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